What's the Plan for the month off from school?

Well hello all. I dont know if that is addressing many people or not, but that is ok! :)

I can repeat this phrase over and over again, "I havent written in there in a long time." Yeah that is pretty much how it always goes. I get going for a while and then I either forget about it, get too busy, or just flat out have nothing to say.

Finals week was a TON of fun even though I had finals the first two days of it. hahaha which isnt quite so bad. I have been home since friday afternoon, and it has been nice to relax and just chill out and give my brain a rest. :)

I cant believe how my first semester of College is officially over. It happened so fast. But I love it! I can say I learned how to study, and how to teach myself when teachers neglected to teach us. *Cough* Psychology *Cough* Yeah that was quite the interesting class. Well nevertheless, I am done and it is a nice feeling.

So what's next? Well Im heading off to Chicago on Friday the 18th to see my friend Lisa whom I worked with in the Czech Republic over the summer. I am really looking forward to spending time with her and her boyfriend Mike, who came out and visited us in Czech this summer. Czech was an experience that we got to share together, and so not many people have the same kind of relationship that we do. It's not like you meet good friends out of the country everyday ya know? :)

And then I will be going to New Years Conference with Campus Outreach. It should be pretty cool. And in between all of that of course there is hanging out with family and good friends from home. And I'll be attempting to mix in some down time. :D

Anyway Life is pretty good! Im missing my college friends, and my BOLD family. But there are several occasions that I get to meet up with them. So Im excited!!!!!!

Merry Christmas Everyone!!!!

Peace

Ready for break anyone?

It is so funny to me how ready I am to go home again. I mean there are people I know that haven't been home since fall break, and people who haven't been home since school has started. I went home two weeks ago for a wedding, and yet I am ready to go. I don't know what it is. I think I am just burnt out and ready for some alone time. I guess you can say that even when you have a do nothing weekend, you still end up doing a lot whether its homework or doing something random with your hallmates/friends or whoever. Not that it isn't fun, minus the hw part, I think it comes down to getting to go home to your OWN room and be by yourself in peace for a few min. That is something that I have learned, at college it is kind of hard to find alone/down time. I come to find so overjoyed when I walk into my empty dorm room on mondays to crash on the couch and have some time alone because everyone is still in class or working.

I really want to be rejuvenated over break. Come back finish finals, sadly say good-byes to people, it will be weird without those people for a month, and then go home and come start my second semester of college. How weird is that?

Today was pretty good. I had my evaluation at work today. It went really well. I am still in love with my job. I have grown and learned so much from it and the people that I am working with. :) However, that history test I took, not such a big fan of at the moment. Once i give my final speech tomorrow in my Com 203 class, I will be home-free! :D Grandma's mashed potatoes with my dad's turkey and ham and Taylor's chocolate chess pie, HERE I COME! hahah.

peace!

What's the Point?

So I was thinking today while I was getting ready after I hit the Cage. What is the point of this life Im living. I am well aware that I am a sinner, and the reality of my imperfections keep settling into my mind and heart. Sometimes I feel so bad because of the way I feel like I might hurt people, whether that means I hurt them or just annoy them.

But as I was thinking, I made this conclusion. What is the point of living when knowing that you can do anything right? No matter what it is you do, in it SOMEWHERE is selfish desire and motive, or its something that is not apart of the law. And that is why we have Jesus. So we dont have to live by that law anymore. But still, I kept thinking, if I know that I cant do anything right, even though I know I am saved by the unfailing grace of the one most high, why should I even try at all to live a life after Christ if I know that I cant do anything right, or worthy for Him. When I am constantly failing and letting Him down, again even having that unfailing grace.

The answer then came to me. This life we have one purpose. One Goal, one prize. And guess what? We don't own this life much less live it. Our job is to let Christ live through us. We are all stinky and full of muck. We cant do it. And yet the point is Jesus chooses to use us through our crap to glorify and bring more and more into His Kingdom. I still don't feel like I quite understand it 100%. And I dont think anyone ever will until that day when we are sitting with him in Heaven. But thats the point. To allow the Trinity to do the work. Cause think about it....... We sure as Heck cant.

Hate this feeling

So there are just those days that I hate. Nothing bad has happened, nothing great. Its not like I had a bad day or anything. I didn't. In fact, it was a pretty decent day. I just feel like Blah. Like I cant figure out how I feel. And I know that we all have those days. Yes I am aware. But I just want to like go run, scream, do something to shake this feeling of being down for no reason. Its been pretty consistent for the past couple of days. I had a a wonderful weekend and it was a breath of fresh air to see people I had not seen in a while. And yesterday was a great chill day, and so was today. I got an excellent grade on my psych test, and I worked out yesterday, and am building up my strength. Things are going well, I just feel blah and I cant figure out why. And that is one thing that I do HATE. When i cant pin point what I am feeling. I guess because it puts me in a state of thinking too much, and I don't enjoy what is right in front of me.

Maybe that is Satan's way of distracting me. Having me in a state of thinking because that is when I start to break and stray away from the light of Christ. It annoys me because there is NOTHING bothering me in particular. And this feeling seeping into my heart, I dont want it, and it drives me up the wall. With time I will be fine and it will go away. But at the moment Im just in a Blah mood. Tomorrow is a new day.

"Therefore do nto worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matt 6:34

Hold my Heart

How long must I pray, must I pray to You?
How long must I wait, must I wait for You?
How long 'til I see Your face, see You shining through?
I'm on my knees, begging You to notice me.
I'm on my knees, Father will you turn to me?

One tear in the dropping rain,
One voice in the sea of pain
Could the maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breakin' heart?
One light, that's all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Won't You come close and hold my heart

I've been so afraid, afraid to close my eyes
So much can slip away before I say goodbye.
But if there's no other way, I'm done asking why.
Cuz I'm on my knees, begging You to turn to me
I'm on my knees, Father will you run to me?

One tear in the dropping rain,
One voice in the sea of pain
Could the maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breakin' heart?
One light, that's all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Won't You come close and hold my heart.

So many questions without answers, Your promises remain
I can't sleep but I'll take my chances to hear You call my name
To hear You call my name

One tear in the dropping rain,
One voice in the sea of pain
Could the maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breakin' heart?
One light, that's all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Won't You come close and hold my heart.

Hold my heart, could you hold my heart?
Hold my heart.

Wow, too much time

So I realize that I have not written in this blog since I was sitting in Irena's flatt in the Czech Republic. Soooooo much has happened in my life and changed since then. Coming home, seeing good friends again, adjusting back to home, and then going to college, where things are continually changing. That actually is the theme of my life at the moment. Constant change. And the funny thing is, I am not such a huge fan of change. To be honest, I kind of hate it, but I realize I have the ability to easily adapt, but you know.

So in Czech I learned a TON about independence, and my spiritual life. I was there for a reason this summer, and I carried all of those lessons from this summer into my now being lived out college life. Spending 2 months away from home, in a Country where I hardly know the language, was really hard. But because of it, I am who I am today.

I could certainly go on and on about the lessons I learned in Czech this summer, but I really want to focus on college at the moment. If you do want to know more about Czech def let me know and I will be more than happy to sit down and talk with you about it! :)

So college. No one could have ever prepared me for it. Its something you cant really be prepared for until you experience it. Its awesome for sure. It is the place where I have met so many new faces, and so many people all at once, you would never think that there could be any time to find alone time. I just remember all through orientation, which was our first few days at school, I just longed for school to start, so I could get into a schedule and get a routine so that I was comfortable and would be able to function without a huge fear of the unknown that was ahead.

Classes have been in full swing for about 3 months now, and I love the fact that I am finally getting plugged into different places on campus. My favorite place by far is my job. :) I work with an organization called BOLD. I love it there. It is a challenge course on campus. Many different groups of people from all different walks of life come in and use the course. I think my favorite part about it, is the people that I get to work with. They have become my family, and we are continue to get to know each other and grow with one another. The other really awesome part of my job is the people that come in to use the challenge course. Right now I am in the process of observing what happens at BOLD, and how we work with those people that come in, and it is pretty awesome. I def can see that being apart of this program is one of the reasons that God brought me to Berry. My life has been really blessed because of it.

The hardest part about college for me so far is my walk with God. I think I have had such a hard time is because of all the change that has been occurring. Trying to get plugged in somewhere I can grow, and somewhere I feel like I am at a home away from home, has certainly been the most difficult, but I think I have found a place, and several groups that I enjoy. There is Campus Outreach, my small group through CO, a bible study that has been started up through the lovely laddies at BOLD, and then Calvary Baptist Church. So, I am certainly being taken care of on the fact of finding places. Now its the inner part of me that I need to work on. Due to recent events in my life I am relearning something I have actually known my entire life. I depend on people way too much for my spiritual satisfaction. And so at this point in time, as I am meeting incredible people at school, who I hope to continue to grow with and come to know more, I need to learn to solely rely on God. Something I was reading in 1 john earlier said it pretty well I thought. " As for you, the anointing you received from him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit—just as it has taught you, remain in him." So the part that is talking about that no one else needs to teach me, He has already taught me, is what stand out.

Well this is a lot to read I suppose. Yes I did go into a lot of details, hahah that is jut who I am. I like to explain things. :) And there I go again. But this is where I am at, and so if I keep my blogging up, then maybe I would leave a novel for people to read. Anyway.......

Peace

A quick update

Well, I am so sorry that it has been a couple of weeks since I have updated this. Actually its only been about a week or so. Anyway, lets see here what has been happening in the most beautiful country in the world to me. Well the weather has pretty much stunk. Its always cold and rainy. I mean last summer it was blasting hot. Now all I ever see is rain. I mean there have been some nicer days, but they are rare these days. It is the middle of June. I would loveeeeee to see some sunshine over here!!!

So this past week I was sick. It was awful. On monday I went to Praha with Lisa to get her boyfriend, Mike, From the airport and hang out in Praha. Well I was miserable. So Tuesday I stayed in bed all day. Irena took great care of me, making me tea and making sure I was good. I was so sad to be in bed, and it was nice out. But oh well, I needed to get rest. I am doing better now, which is good. I hate being sick in other countries. So lame.

I was in Zdar this weekend! It was wonderful getting to see everyone from last summer. Friday I spent the day with most of the girls I had met last summer. They all met me at the train station. It was sooooo werid not having to talk to them on the internet, I was just talking to them in person. It was great! And that night I went on an outreach with the church and got to be with Honza and his dad, which was really cool. I am discovering more and more my gift with kids and people. I have the ability to think of things to entertain kids and draw them in on the spot. I know that it is def a God given thing. =)

Then on Saturday I was with the Boys, meaning, Daivd, Honza, and Lukas. It was so great getting to spend time with them.

Something I keep thinking about is if I will return here next summer. Maybe for not as long considering I will be in college and who knows what my life will look like with working and so on, but maybe for three weeks more or less of the summers to come, I could make it back out here. I think that would be pretty cool! =)

Well I think I am going to write more about the ministry that has been going on tomorrow or so, I have become un poco distracted by House. =) hahaha

Later!

You make Everything Glorious

So I tittled this Everything Glroious because at the end of today I had that song stuck in my head and I looked back on today, and it made perfect sense.

So it is extremely strange to me that Lisa and I have so much time to jump online. I orginally had thought that we wouldnt, but what I discovered, we are living out here. So there is a lot of down time like normal life, mixed in with long crazy weeks/days. Today was packed full, and I loved it.

First we met with the pastor, Roman, that we had met with earlier in the week to make plans for English Camp. And then he had asked us when would a good time be to take us around the city where the camp would be, so it was this morning. We got into the car, and I sat next to his daughter that wouldnt even look at us because she was so shy. Hahah I tottally remember doing that as a Five year old. =) And then once we had been with them for a while, she warmed up and didnt stop. =) hahah shes like a firecracker of energy.

And then we came back to Chotebor, and met with Joanie to go to Halvickuv Brod for Lunch with David and Jana from there. It was cool because I had met David last week when we played basketball, which I played horribly. hahah.

Then we went to the nursing home. At this point, my head was hurting like crazy. See I had another episode on Tuesday. I almost passed out. Dehydration. This time I wasnt at a high alttitude, but I handt had enough water for a couple of days. yeah I know, it was dumb, and this has to be the abs last straw. So I have been somewhat shaky for the past few days, but I am doing good.

Anyway, the nursing home was great. I still wish I could have spoken Czech because there werent enough translators around the room. But that was ok. We ended up just holding their hands and talking to them as best as we could. It was two Czechs, Lisa, and Joanie, so it was Lisa and I who needed translation. hahah. For some reason I am not as "prominetly" asking God for the language. I dunno if it is becuase I am tired, or I have just given up. Pray that I rely on his supernatural powers. That I break my apathy, and learn to not give up. That is something that I am supposed to learn out here. To not give up. I have many skills and gifts, but I give up so easily sometimes. I learned that I am tottally capable of not giving up, I am in Czech dont ya know. =)

I ended up sitting next to this woman, who kept telling me how much I looked like her grandaughter. She also had been in Mexico and spoke spanish and English, the grandaughter. So we went and saw the picture, and it was crazy, I did look like her. =) She told me that she now had a gradaughter in America. It was me. I was so touched. All I did was sit next to her, and love her, and hold her hand.

Then we went to a youth group in Horni krupa. Hahah yes Horni, with an accent over the i. And it was cool to see how a small youth group functioned. And these kids were all pretty young minus a 15 year old. And then Lida came. She is so cool. She is 21 and full of life and love for Jesus. I get to go hang out with her and Lisa tomorrow at her youth group and then I am going to go and stay with them at Lidas. It is going to be AWESOME! =)

And then on sunday we are going to Romans for lunch with his family. And then a treasure hunt thing with the kids. I am looking foward to it. I really love being with the people here. It may seem like I dont go out and enjoy Europe, but being in the villages and with the people is my kind of scene. I live for that, being with people and being inspired by them. =)

So what I have learned so far out here; Independence, and still LEARNING A TON ABOUT IT. Attempting to believe in myself and not giving up, that is something new that was brought to my attention, so I too have a long way with that. Alone time with God is Vital. I dont have Altaer on thursdays and Sundays to help me grow. I dont really have too much church here either because I dont understand what is going on in the service. Of course I have grown and plan to grow with the people here, but it really boils down to me and God. And that is exaclty what I need.

Everything is glorious, and everything happens within God's timing. The future ahead of me is Bright and big. I have no idea what it hold and what it contains, but from experience, whatever it is, God has made it Glorious.

Beauty

Hmmm so I am not exactly sure what I will put in here. But it will be a lot and a little of everything.

Where to begin? Now its sunday, and my last post was what thursday? Friday we went to view a sports school. In Czech they have special schools, and this school was focusing on sports. So during their classes they can have a special time set aside to be able to focus on their sport. So its like having a PE class during school, but training for ice hockey, or whatever.

Then we had lunch and ran into Robert. I had met him at wresteling practice the night before. He doesnt wrestle, he was just there to translate. By the way, wresteling practice, REALLY AWAKARD! Hahah I was the only girl there. There was a purpose, but I am not really quite sure as to what. Maybe it was to meet Robert. Who knows?

Then we went and played volleyball. Ok so I have played volleyball for fun. Not like a serious game or anything. HAHAHA The Czechs were serious volleyballers. When I was up at the front of the net, the tall guy on the other side would spike it, and i would duck and cover! Hahaha it was really funny, but I was really scared about getting my face smashed in!

Saturday we went to a few catherdals and to lunch( czech out pics on facebook for the catherdals), and the rest of the team and Lisa went to Prague, and Joanie and I went home. I was alone for the night, so I facebooked Iva, and she came over. It has been great to get to know her. She is my Czech sister. Hahah we seriously look alike! =D I think that I have mentioned that in here already, but whatever.

And today I got to go to Zdar church and saw David and Honza and Sasha and her family and the other David. It was great!!!!! =D And then i went to prague for a while to do some shopping and to say goodbye to the team. Oh FYI, Lisa is an excellent shopper, so to all of you out there who are worried about my shopping skills, shes got you coverd. =D On the train ride home the sunset was AMAZING!!!! =D That is why I tittled this beauty. there is beauty everywhere here.

Well does anyone have any specific questions? I would love to get comments from you guys! You can always facebook me or e-mail or whatever. Just dont call me...... Haha.

I hope that everyone is enjyoing their summer. I know that I am.

Laura

Living

So I can officially say that I have lived in another country. How cool is that? I mean two months in a country in Europe should be considered living there. At least I think so.

Being on the other side of the missions team is a HUGE difference. I have freedom to do whatever I decide within what we are doing that day. I dont have to ask to do certain things, and I can kind of just go when and where I want. Its kind of weird, and they keep reminding me that I dont have to tell them every five seconds where I am going. Its really cool, it just is taking some time getting used to it. Hahaha

And by not being on a missions team, with only a certain amount of days for ministry, like 12 days or so. So I have down time in between things, and not on the go like you would be on a regualr missions trip. Its extremely weird, because that is all I have ever known. But by living here, and becoming one of the people, it is crazy cool.

I have enjoyed having the Northwestern team out here. It is really cool to have a group of Americans with us. But they are the only team that we will have for the summer, so it will be different, but cool at the same time, because it will be more of an opportunity to become one of the people here.

Life is real. Living on your own is real. I pray that I am learning alot about independence and becoming wise.

Building

Wow! What a weekend it has been. So on friday me, Joanie, Irena, Lisa, 9 gyspies, Iva, and a team of 9 Americans from Northwestern University went to a cabin a couple hours away from Chotebor. (Hotebocsh)

If you could tell when I was writing on friday, I was a little down. I really didnt have a reason to, but I just didnt feel like I had hoped I guess. Like pumped up. But as soon as we met the kids, we started building relationships. I got to know Tereza, Deneska, Francie(3 of the gyspie girls) Adriana( a gyspie girl that is 19 that came to help), and Iva( a Czech girl that can speak English ans is also following Christ.

It was crazy how fast I got to know some of the kids, and especially Iva and Adriana. Adriana really imtimitaed me at first when I met her at Irena's for their weekly meeting. The girls at the weekly meetings arent christians, but God has Blessed Joanie and Irena to be able to build relationships with these kids to allow them to speak the name of Christ into their lives.

Anyway, I am not really sure how I got to know Adriana, but by God's power, I built a really cool relationship through my crazy silly Americanness. =) I will continue to see her thoughout the summer. Please Pray that God uses me in that relationship and that not only her life is Changed, but mine is as well.

Iva, Adriana, and myself decided that we are triplets. Iva and I actually look alike. One of the kids asked if we were sisters. Hahah. And Adriana is a gypsie, so its really funny.

I also got to know the Northwestern Team. they are all pretty cool.

Something that I really realized about myself is that I build relationships fast. And good ones. Its weird, but it is a gift that God has given me, and I pray that I use it. Thats why I tittled this Building, FYI.

So what we did this weekend, we went to the cabin on friday, travled by bus and train, and walking of course. In Czech, you walk EVERYWHERE. Its nothing to them. So you want to run to the store, you walk, lunch? You walk. The train station? You walk. hahaha. Its nice though. At home I really cant walk anywhere because I would probably get smoshed by a car, or it would be an extremely long walk. So we got to the cabin, and it was Freezing. It has been rainy and cold here since wed. I guess I brought atlanta weather here, and Lisa brought the cold weather. Shes from the north. So we played pictionary that night, just with the pictures, and I believe that is when I really got to connect with Adriana. =) And then we went to bed and got to know some of the Northwestern girls, we were bunking with them.

Then the next morining we had breakfast and then chilled out waiting for the rain to pass, it didnt. But we went "czech walking" and toured two castles.

Ok. Two things. 1. Czech walking is like a power walk. And no to those of you who I complain to that you walk to fast, I was not walking slow. Hahaha. 2. I was dehydrated, and therefore lunch made my stomach all grumbly, and I was sick to my stomach. Not throwing up sick. But the other way. Haha you got me. So I was kind of miserable the last leg, but I ended up getting through it.

But I did however create a poem of what I had learned that day. Its goes something like this

God's love is still here when you are as wet as a dog and as cold as a snowman.
God's love is still here when you are about to crap in your pants walking through castels in the Czech Republic in the cold and wet rain.
His love never leaves and it always remains.

haha. Its short but sweet. Anyway last night was a ton of fun.

I was in the kitchen with Lisa, who had been sick the whole day, and slept it off, which was good, Adriana, Romana, and Katya. Katya turned on the radio, and I let my awesome dances moves come out. Lisa joined me and we had the girls doubled over in laughter. I love making people laugh. Amazingness, and I think that made them feel more comfortable around us. When we act silly, it opens doors. Imagine that.

And then once the kids were asleep, we played good ole phase 10. For the first time in my phase 10 career, I made it to phase 9!!!!!! WAHOO!!!! My first full game of phase 10, I know I didnt win, but it was cool anyway to actually have finished a game.

We packed up the next day and we left. My Czech is really picking up, which is AWESOME!!!! Several people on the train today had their mouths hanging open when i started speaking Perfect English after I had told the kids to simply wait or said something in Czech to one of them. Hahahaha ITS AWESOME!!!!!

But out of everything, relationships are blooming up all around me here. I praise God that I can be open and willing like that. I hope that everyone back home is well.

Feel free to comment!!!! =)

Laura

ps- sorry for the spelling errors. ;)

What is to come

So there are moments in everyones life where the road ahead is unknown. I feel like I am thinking too much about what I am going to learn this summer. And it hasnt even started yet. Its crazy. I really want to grow. But I feel like I am begining to worry about if I am going to grow or not. Which is completely silly. Its my third day out here.

Anyway today we are heading up to the cabin, which is about 3 hours away from Chotebor. (Hotebocsh) Pray that it doesnt rain. The kids dont really have good clothes for that kind of weather, and we would be inside for a majority of the time.

Lisa came in last night. The other American. Its awesome to have someone else here that is in the same boat as I am. I am looking foward to getting to know her. She seems pretty cool.

Well we are about to pray for the weekend. I will update soon! Pray big for these kids this weekend.

Later!

Wisdom

I tittled this wisdom because this morning it was on my heart. I feel like this summer I am going to gain a lot of wisdom about being independent and tottaly relying on God.

So today, pretty cool. I have a lot of time for e-mail and stuff, for now, which I wasnt really expecting, but its cool. It give me a chance to catch up with people back home and write in here!!!

I woke up at 10 am here, to try to get rid of Jet lag. I am staying at Irena's place, which is pretty cool! She, Jonanie, and Misha are all pretty cool. So I got a tour of the town today, met some of the gypsie kids. They are kids that are Indian, there people migrated here centuries ago. So they term gyspie is used. When we met them, I knew instantly that this is why I was here. To love on people like crazy!

I pretty much get to walk around the town, and will do it independently when I get to know it a little better. Which is ballin! I went grocery shopping for myself today too. It was crazy werid. I mean I knew what I needed to get, but it was really weird, because I had to think about how much I needed and how long it would last me. Hahahaha.

Irena and Joanie meet with the older gyspie kids on mondays. Girls as Irena's and Boys at Joanies. I am with Joanie and the boys. They are pretty cool and I am sooooo looking foward to building relationships with them. And the girls as well when I see them.

So it hasnt been too crazy here, but it really depends on the week. Tomorrow I am making cookies from complete scratch, it was a bit diffcult, and the ingredients are a bit different, so its an experience. Hahaha.

Well I am going to go, I need to get to bed soon. I am still quite exahusted!!!

I love you all!

Cau!

Traveling

Traveling can be a lot of fun! i am all for it. But it hits you when you havent slept at all. I have been up since 9:30am on May 25th. Its like a 11am where I am now, at the gate in Germany. But ya know it was all right. But there was a screaming kid, actually 3 screaming kids throughout the flight. One in particular was sooooooo undisiplined, it was crazy! The mom was nice, but the kid was awful! I am so greatful to my dad for bring me up the way he did. Even though we but heads a lot, I am very greatful.

So The franfurt airport is pretty big. I got off at the B concourse, and I walked for a good 30ish min before reaching my gate. It is really cool being able to travel bymyself, but I have to be way more aware than I do when I am traveling with people. And what is really funny, I have hardly talked at all. I mean I have to the passangers around me, but I have not made to many comments to others. hahaha Funny.

Well I am sitting at the gate for another 45 min or so. But I have run out of things to write. I am not sure when I will have a chance to write again, but I will try to soon.

Oh I really wish I could speak German at this point in time. That is scary hearing me say that, because i dont like German, No offense Gina. =) But I really wish I could speak it right now. Hmmmm anyway I hope that everyone is doing well!!!!

Laura

Every new begining comes from some other beginings end~ Roman Philosopher

I think the quote that I used to tittle this piece was very fitting considering the fact that I am about to enter a new phase of life, from the end of something else. I know my last blog was about a new beginning, so this is somewhat steaming off of that.

Well so here I am about to leave for the Czech Republic on Monday. I never knew that I would ever see that day. I was re-reading this blog a couple of weeks ago, and in one of them I was talking about how frustrated I was with my parents and how they couldn't see why I wanted to go so bad. God is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo faithful.

I don't know if I ever shared the story with a lot of people of how I knew I was going to go back. But I guess this is the best moment to share. Several things happened. We were walking back from a nursing home that we had just visited, and I heard one of my team members talking with the missionary about coming back the next summer. Well that is when my creative juices got going in my head. I was wondering if that would be something that I could do.

Then that night during worship, I felt as if the Holy Spirit was telling me that I was going to be there the next summer. I knew for a fact that it was not myself in my head saying that, I know it was God. Which was strange because I immediately thought of all the obstacles that I would have to overcome.

And two different people at two different times told me I was coming back. The first time was when we were at the church in Zdar for the last time. She said in Czech, " Don't worry, you will be here next summer." And then one of the homeless men that kind of knew who we were, but I had never really talked to told Joanie that he really wanted me to come back next summer. I had never spoken to him, I might have just smiled at him a couple of times. And here he was wanting me to come back.

I never thought in a million years that my dad would allow me to go. But I realized that if this was God's will two things would happen. 1. His will. 2. He would work on my parents hearts according to his plan. Crazy huh?

Now here I am about to start a new chapter in my life. I am excited, scared, nervous, anxious, and have not a clue as to what is going to happen this summer. Whatever does, I will grow in ways that I would have never imagined. I will learn things that I could have not learned anywhere else.

I plan to keep all of you updated by this blog. I don't really think many people read it, but hopefully I will get word out there.

I hope that everyone has a fantastic summer!!!

Laura

The Begining

As this school year is coming to a close, I am suddenly realizing that my life as an individual is about to take off. I will no longer be 100% dependent on my parents. Not that I am now, but as far as teenagers in high school I am.

A series of things are about to start happening.
1. I will graduate high school. That is from 12 years of getting up on week days before 9am. I am about to leave that.
2. I will be traveling half way across the world by myself for the first time. With no other group. Just me.
3. College. And Im currently trying to figure out how I am going to get motivated to be a good student. These last few months of school I have been nothing but lazy. And I have no one to blame but myself. That is all on me. But I am Soooooooo excited for college. With the new responsibilities, I think I will, I hope to be more motivated. I better be or I will be in big trouble. Not just with my dad either.....

So its weird thinking that I am not going to hear my mom say everyday, " Hi little waitt, How was your day?" Yes that is what she calls me. Why? I have not a clue. But it is all exciting at the same time.

Oh and I am going to have to find a new church home. I am kind of worried about it, but not too much. I know that where I will end up will be the place that I am supposed to be. It is just the process. I havent searched for a church to get pluged into in over 6 years.

All new experiences. It will be weird, but liberating in a sense. =)

I pray that I stay focused. I worry that I will stray, but I shouldnt. I wonder what is to come and how my life will change. But I know that I will look back and I can see how far I have come. Oh wow is all I can say........

Dynamos

Troubled as the world may call it, but searching is her heart. Searching for that peace that will make her complete. Consumed with thoughts of craving attention and love, yet knowing that there is a much greater love out there by the creator. Pushing and fighting, screaming on the inside for freedom even though she has already been freed. What can stop this madness? What can convince her inner being of what her head and heart strive to believe? "Why am I discouraged? Why so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him againg, my savior and my God." Pslam 42:5



So Im kind of tired of trusting people more than I trust God. Its plain in simple. There is no beating around the bush. I have been doing that for sooooo long. And it has become a part of me. My worries stem from my lack of trust in God. When I talk about worry, people always remind me that it is lack of faith. I know it too. I don't need to be reminded of it. Well here I am being as honest as possible.



Dynamos- explosive power. Crazy awesome explosive power. This is what we have with the holy spirit. CRAZY AWESOME EXPLOSIVE POWER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The world can change because of this. Dynomos. Lets cut the crap, and the games we play all the time. I know that I have played games for sooooo long.

Our job is simple. We are to witness. To Live and to be ourselves, share our lives with others and The Holy Spirit does the rest. We must be actively searching for God with our hearts, but He will do the rest. The dynamos.

Lalalalalalala Live out Loud.